


time runs out.

by mayaetienne



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/F, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:53:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26283706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mayaetienne/pseuds/mayaetienne
Summary: let me go. it’s okay.maybe that was herself trying to convince herself that it would be okay. because she didn’t know if she was truly okay. truly okay with dying.she had never really thought about it. death.natasha during her final moments before her death.
Relationships: Maria Hill/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	time runs out.

**Author's Note:**

> did my best christopher nolan impression and wrote a fic on time finally catching up to natasha.
> 
> yes writing the fic in lowercase is a stylistic feature, if you're bothered by it go write an analysis on it or something

they say time stops when you are near death.

it slows down so much, it practically feels like years before you let go from the hand still attaching you towards life.

she’s heard stories from people who say you see a blinding white light, welcoming you into the afterlife. stories where they relive out an old passing memory they once had. stories where they meet a sibling or relative they never knew existed. stories where they live out the rest of their life in the seconds before it all goes.

she’s also heard stories from people where death is nothing more than hitting the snooze on your alarm and allowing yourself to fall back asleep.

but the one that scares her the most, is dying and being greeted with nothing. just an endless silence where time doesn’t matter and it’s all inverted. staring to the void of death, watching yourself cross the barrier that stops you from going back.

_let me go. it’s okay._

maybe that was herself trying to convince herself that it would be okay. because she didn’t know if she was truly okay. truly okay with dying.

she had never really thought about it. death. 

when she was younger, she was taught to never fear death. embrace it. see it as an obstacle.

she learnt very quickly that the red room sees their agents as disposable. as if they were merely toilet paper, to be used once and never seen again. as if they weren’t people with life around them, in them, wanting to experience time flowing with them. they never had enough time.

_time._

she had always seemed to escape it’s clutches.

_time._

always running. never stopping, never slowing down.

_time._

she had watched other people’s time run out.

_time._

this time she couldn’t escape it’s clutches.

_time._

maybe all she wanted was more-

_time._

_it had stopped._

she felt every atom, every cell of her body stop. she felt like her consciousness derived itself from her body, pulling itself away from her state of existence.

she entered a new sense of reality, where it wasn’t completely pitch black like she had been afraid of, but it was just there.

in a way, she had always felt it there. this feeling in a different reality, where everything was just _there._

her eyes closed, floating across this ocean that wasn’t quite there, but also was. slowly drifting along the water, waves moving her towards her final destination.

there’s something oddly calming about not having to do anything. not having to force yourself to breathe, or open your eyes.

she drifts, and she drifts, and she drifts, she doesn’t know how long she drifts for, but when she finally opens her eyes she watches as the pages of a picture book turn. 

there’s an oddly sort of calm feeling watching the pages turning, flipping, inverting, showing her what her life could have been like. maybe her other selves in alternate realities could achieve what she couldn’t.

_maria._

how she missed her. 

_maria._

she had once fantasised about living life like a normal human. a nice house. a nice wife. a cat maybe. maybe even kids. they may have even been happy.

_maria._

she’s glad she at least made that last phone call to her. something in her knew she wouldn’t be seeing her again. 

_maria._

she longs for the soft touches on her cheeks, the quick kisses behind closed doors, the sneaking around and hiding anything related to each other so people wouldn’t find out. 

_maria._

god, how she wished she had more- 

_time._

_it had started again._

**Author's Note:**

> look if there's some tenet influences in there, i watched it and now i can not stop thinking about it. (seriously what was the movie, what did i watch i am so confused)
> 
> * * *
> 
> [MAYAETlENNE](https://twitter.com/MAYAETlENNE) on twitter


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